Waiting
by dowagerlinks
Summary: TsuzukiHisoka...mostly ShonenAi. Mostly no plot, but Hisoka's feelings and a poor cake that only gets an intro....okay I really need to be shot now.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Waiting

Summary: Tsuzuki/Hisoka. Um… there is not much plot, but Hisoka understands his own feelings and Tsuzuki who is totally oblivious ... as usual.

Disclaimer: Me no own Yami no Matsuei

Hisoka looked down switching his gaze from the melting sunset to the various colored leaves aimlessly floating, blowing in the nonexistent wind.

Swallowing hard, comely emerald eyes slightly blurred, shutting tightly as not to slip on an emotion, as to not fall to deep, as to not release his newly placed burden.

Hisoka shuddered wrapping his arms tightly around himself eloping into his own comfort. Not really understanding or rather not wanting to understand why he always became so upset when Tsuzuki was late. Of course he never let his partner know it bothered him… after all he was always late… was he not?

Hisoka's thoughts dispersed as a familiar figure approached the swings where Hisoka had been so patiently waiting.

Hisoka's eyes fell to the near sound of crunching gravel as a shadow appeared above him.

The blonde's mood and position changed feeling his partners warm hand against his cheek, tilting his head up; emerald orbs staring straight into pools of endless amethyst.

Tsuzuki crouched down, smiling at Hisoka's changed expression.

"Hey Soka, I'm really sorry that I am late… but I brought you a present!" Tsuzuki's eyes turned to a puppy dog sneer as he groped at the contents of his pocket, producing a small cake, a favorite of Hisoka's.

His usual puppy dog grin was posted from ear to ear, he was always unusually proud of his simple trinkets.

Hisoka's heart stopped. Such a simple gesture, such a childish attempt to reassure his friend that he was sincere in his apology, yet ever time Hisoka laid eyes on his partner his heart beat faster and his cheek's warmed. Guilt led Hisoka's thoughts feeling sad was a bad understatement.

Hisoka gripped the swings chains before lunging forward, tackling Tsuzuki arms tight around his neck and face buried in Tsuzuki's chest.

Hisoka panted against Tsuzuki's chest, compelled to burst in a fit of emotion.

Tsuzuki first dumbstruck smiled, chuckling somewhat.

"Maybe… I should be late more often…."

A/N: Oh God, how that sucked! I really should be burned alive for this piece of crap. This is called…Uh I was bored one day. There is virtually no plot it is just some mindless dribble and sweet stuff floating in my bad description. Really I should be shot, but alas I love Hisoka and Tsuzuki and I love them loving each other so this developed. Sorry if it is hard to follow, but I was really just trying to get this idea down. Oh dear I really do ramble a lot….any who if you like or love it please tell me and if you don't well…that's fine too. If I get plenty of good reviews I'll probably write a couple of more chapters. Dear God help us all. PLEASE REVIEW!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

Disclaimer: I do not own Yami no Matsuei in any aspect. It all belongs to Yoko Matsushita, the luckiest person in the world. T-T

Warning: There is not much to warn about, though it is my writing so that is a warning in itself. It is shonen ai in a thought…not really…sort of. The next chapter is a bit rougher though so beware. Tsuzki/Hisoka.

A warm breeze settled amongst the room. Burgundy curtains hung loose against the small window, as silver gleams danced against the wall.

The moon in its almost blurry glory glowed a coat of lavender, as did its craters; etched in an aura of complete harmony.

Hisoka glanced up, emerald orbs shinning with the mist of tears. The blonde sighed; a slight quiver loomed in his throat, a clue to his upset posture.

His gaze switched; again, landing on the dying roses in the corner. Sadness once again filled the youth as a sparkling stream from an emerald lake was quickly wiped away by a baggy sleeve.

Hisoka rolled over burring his face in the slept in sheets.

" His sheets"

His thoughts seemed to all ways begin and end with "him".

Being a guardian of death would never be an easy profession, but being alone was something Hisoka could never bear again.

" He is a warmth that no one could ever bring".

Before begin alone was simple…somewhat bearable. Now, he had someone to miss, someone to…love.

Being close to someone like that would never leave Hisoka vulnerable to anything. All though…he felt vulnerable all most all of the time, not that Tsuzuki took advantage of Hisoka. It was simply a vulnerability that was coaxed from the blonde's abused past. Being alone, tortured, and manipulated to the last aspect was all he was accompanied too.

A bond, a healing friendship, was what Tsuzuki had given him. But, a lukewarm attitude all ways approached the young partners features. He wasn't angry and he wasn't doleful. He was simply upset, at best frustrated with himself. He always trying to tell himself that he wanted a strong friendship with his partner, but over half the time he couldn't even manipulate his own feelings to understand why he all ways wanted Tsuzuki to be closer to him.

Tsuzuki never dismissed Hisoka, but this new emotion somewhat puzzled Tsuzuki. He was usually good at reading his partner, but lately he had absolutely no indication of what was going through the blonde's head.

Rejection was one of the things that tormented Hisoka the most. But even though his gift was strong he still could not find a single complementary feeling from Tsuzuki.

Reading Tsuzuki was usually simple but, finding that harbored emotion that Hisoka tried his best to ignore was not easy to find. To truly understand Tsuzuki though would be only something Hisoka could do.

Hisoka gripped the sheets forcing back his emotions. Weak sobs echoed throughout the small inn's room, as he finally came to terms with himself.

Hisoka's state was only caused by him and his emotions were for him. Never to leek his true understanding of why he all ways felt this way.

Frail was the only word, in which to describe him but this conclusion shook his entire body.

No matter how hard he tried. No matter how much he longed. He could never utter those simple words.

" I love you".

A/N: Oh, dear. This really was terrible. I am sorry. Someone should stop me…really.

As usually I broke Hisoka down. I like to use his insecurities. It is what makes him real to me. I am such a bad person. This whole FF is called I just don't see either of the characters owing up to their own feelings in JUST one chapter. It is many chapters. I am pretty wordy though so this will probably take awhile. Don't worry though, the plot will appear soon. I promise more dialogue in the third chapter. Also, has anyone noticed that there is not a big link to the first and second chapter? Opps 0.o the third chapter links the two though. Sorry. PLEASE REVIEW. Your reviews are the only thing keeping me alive. Good review, Ne?


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